Chaos Before Peace

There are things that we can't control in life, and why should we try? Why can't we just let it flow as it wants, let the chaos subside by itself while we maintain a peaceful mind and a calm pose.

These days has been hard on me. Suddenly I become fearful to swallow food. It just came from nowhere even though I have had it before. But it struck me hard in the last few weeks. It's hard to explain this fear and phobia to my family and friends. They are supportive and wants the best for me, but some of them can't understand what I'm going through. That's fair enough, I can't expect them to understand when they haven't experience what I'm going through.

I can't stress this enough, but please, don't try to know it all when you haven't actually walk in the person's shoes. You don't really know how painful and distress it is when you have never gone through it. Be supportive as much as you can. Give them space and let them proceed in their own pace. A warm hug, a smile and a clap on the shoulder gives them the hope to try harder on winning the game between the fear and the joy they'll experience when they finally can let go of theirs anxiety.

I tell you this, it's because I'm going through it now as I mention above.

I appreciate the tips and support I can get from all of you. Just give me tips on how I can overcome this, I do try my best to eat, even though the anxiety of swalloing food is big, I still try.

I haven't write in a long while now. Part is because I don't have so much inspiration, and the other part is because I'm finally free for emotional pain. Well, maybe not totally free, but I'm out of the winter long depression. I don't cry that easily over my past any longer.

I have tried to practies many methods I have learn from books I have read, and I find myself stronger than before. Those methods help in some degree. While I still work hard to maintain my peace and happiness and to be a better person than I was.

I hope those who read my blogs find themselv and truly understand the love that the Universe is giving to us.